"We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything - what a waste!"
― Andre Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"I'm like you,' he said. 'I remember everything.'
I stopped for a second. If you remember everything, I wanted to say, and if you are really like me, then before you leave tomorrow, or when you're just ready to shut the door of the taxi and have already said goodbye to everyone else and there's not a thing left to say in this life, then, just this once, turn to me, even in jest, or as an afterthought, which would have meant everything to me when we were together, and, as you did back then, look me in the face, hold my gaze, and call me by your name"
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"He came. He left. Nothing else had changed. I had not changed. The world hadn't changed. Yet nothing would be the same. All that remains is dreammaking and strange remembrance."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"People who read are hiders. They hide who they are. People who hide don't always like who they are."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"If I could have him like this in my dreams every night of my life, I'd stake my entire life on dreams and be done with the rest."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"And on that evening when we grow older still we'll speak about these two young men as though they were two strangers we met on the train and whom we admire and want to help along. And we'll want to call it envy, because to call it regret would break our hearts."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Most of us can't help but live as though we've got two lives to live, one is the mockup, the other the finished version, and then there are all those versions in between. But there's only one, and before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it. Right now there's sorrow. I don't envy the pain. But I envy you the pain. (p. 225)"
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Time makes us sentimental. Perhaps, in the end, it is because of time that we suffer."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"I suddenly realized that we were on borrowed time, that time is always borrowed, and that the lending agency exacts its premium precisely when we are least prepared to pay and need to borrow more..."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Did I want him to act? Or would I prefer a lifetime of longing provided we both kept this little Ping-Pong game going: not knowing, not-not-knowing, not-not-not-knowing? Just be quiet, say nothing, and if you can't say "yes," don't say "no," say "later." Is this why people say "maybe" when they mean "yes," but hope you'll think it's "no" when all they really mean is, Please, just ask me once more, and once more after that?"
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"We are not written for one instrument alone; I am not, neither are you."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the truth, maybe I didn't want things to turn abstract, but I felt I should say it, because this was the moment to say it, because it suddenly dawned on me that this was why I had come, to tell him 'You are the only person I'd like to say goodbye to when I die, because only then will this thing I call my life make any sense. And if I should hear that you died, my life as I know it, the me who is speaking with you now, will cease to exist."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"We rip out so much of ourselves to be cured of things faster than we should that we go bankrupt by the age of thirty and have less to offer each time we start with someone new. But to feel nothing so as not to feel anything—what a waste!"
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Twenty years was yesterday, and yesterday was just earlier this morning, and morning seemed light-years away."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Perhaps we were friends first and lovers second. But then perhaps this is what lovers are."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"I may have come close, but I never had what you had. Something always held me back or stood in the way. How you live your life is your business. But remember, our hearts and our bodies are given to us only once. Most of us can't help but live as though we've got two lives to live, one is the mockup, the other the finished version, and then there are all those versions in between. But there's only one, and before you know it, your heart is worn out, and, as for your body, there comes a point when no one looks at it, much less wants to come near it. Right now there's sorrow. I don't envy the pain. But I envy you the pain."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Everyone goes through a period of Traviamento - when we take, say, a different turn in life, the other via. Dante himself did. Some recover, some pretend to recover, some never come back, some chicken out before even starting, and some, for fear of taking any turns, find themselves leading the wrong life all life long."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"I'm not wise at all. I told you, I know nothing. I know books, and I know how to string words together--it doesn't mean I know how to speak about the tings that matter most to me."
"But you're doing it now--in a way."
"Yes, in a way--that's how I always say things: in a way."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Every time I go back to Rome, I go back to that one spot. It is still alive for me, still resounds with something totally present, as though a heart stolen from a tale by Poe still throbbed under the ancient slate pavement to remind me that, here, I had finally encountered the life that was right for me but had failed to have."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Zwischen Immer und Nie. Zwischen Immer und Nie. Between always and never."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"If he knew, if he only knew that I was giving him every chance to put two and two together and come up with a number bigger than infinity."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"We belonged to each other, but had lived so far apart that we belonged to others now."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"They are embossed on every song that was a hit that summer, in every novel I read during and after his stay, on anything from the smell of rosemary on hot days to the frantic rattle of the cicadas in the afternoon—smells and sounds I'd grown up with and known every year of my life until then but that had suddenly turned on me and acquired an inflection forever colored by the events of that summer."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Over the years I'd lodged him in the permanent past, my pluperfect lover, put him on ice, stuffed him with memories and mothballs like a hunted ornament confabulating with the ghost of all my evenings. I'd dust him off from time to time and then put him back on the mantelpiece. He no longer belonged to earth or to life. All I was likely to discover at this point wasn't just how distant were the paths we'd taken, it was the measure of loss that was going to strike me--a loss I didn't mind thinking about in abstract terms but which would hurt when stared at in the face, the way nostalgia hurts long after we've stopped thinking of things we lost and may never have cared for."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"I'm not wise at all. I told you, I know nothing. I know books, and I know how to string words together—it doesn't mean I know how to speak about the things that matter most to me."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
"Fear not. It will come. At least I hope it does. And when you least expect it. Nature has cunning ways of finding our weakest spot."
― André Aciman, Call Me by Your Name
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